For too long, women with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) have been met with dismissive comments, confusing medical advice, and outright gaslighting. Despite being one of the most common hormonal disorders, affecting up to 1 in 10 women of reproductive age, PCOS is still misunderstood, underdiagnosed, and minimized. Women deserve answers about PCOS.
What Does Gaslighting Around PCOS Look Like?
PCOS gaslighting often shows up in subtle (and not so subtle) ways:
- “It’s just in your head.” Symptoms like fatigue, anxiety, and brain fog are brushed off instead of being investigated.
- “Just lose weight and everything will be fine.” Oversimplifying a complex metabolic and hormonal condition shifts blame onto women instead of addressing root causes.
- “Your labs look normal, so you must be fine.” Many women have classic symptoms of PCOS even when basic bloodwork doesn’t fit neatly into a checklist. Remember that lab ranges are not even set based on what is “normal.” They’re averages of abnormal people.
- “You can’t have PCOS, you’re thin.” Weight does not determine whether someone has PCOS, yet this myth still prevents countless women from receiving a timely diagnosis.
- “It’s not a big deal.” PCOS isn’t just about irregular periods. Left unaddressed, it increases the risk of infertility, diabetes, heart disease, endometrial cancer, and mental health struggles.
These messages invalidate real suffering and perpetuate shame. They leave women feeling isolated, unheard, and desperate for answers about PCOS.
The Cost of Being Dismissed with PCOS
When women’s concerns are minimized, years can pass without a proper diagnosis. This delay means:
- Struggling with infertility without understanding why.
- Living with acne, hair loss, or excess hair growth that undermines confidence and self-esteem.
- Battling weight gain or metabolic issues with no explanation.
- Increased risk of long-term health complications because early intervention was missed.
The emotional toll is just as heavy. Many women describe feeling like their bodies are betraying them, or worse, that they are personally to blame.
Why PCOS Deserves Serious Attention
PCOS is not a minor inconvenience or just a cosmetic issue. It’s a complex condition involving insulin resistance, inflammation, and hormonal imbalances that impact nearly every system in the body. Research has linked PCOS to:
- Cardiovascular disease
- Type 2 diabetes and prediabetes
- Endometrial cancer
- Anxiety and depression
Recognizing PCOS for the serious condition it is allows women to get appropriate support, not just band-aid solutions.
How We Can End the Gaslighting of People with PCOS
- Listen First. Women know their bodies. When they say something is wrong, believe them.
- Widen the Diagnostic Lens. PCOS doesn’t look the same in every woman. Thin women can have PCOS. Women with “normal” lab results can still have PCOS. A whole-person approach is needed.
- Move Beyond Weight. Reducing PCOS to a weight problem ignores the underlying biology. Treatments should focus on hormonal balance, metabolic health, and emotional well-being.
- Provide Real Education. Women deserve clear, science-based explanations about their condition, answers about PCOS, and options for care.
- Advocate for Better Research. Despite its prevalence, PCOS is underfunded and under-researched. We need more studies, more treatments, and more answers.
A Call to Action for Women with PCOS
Every woman with PCOS deserves to feel validated, supported, and hopeful. Ending the gaslighting starts with shifting the narrative, from blame and dismissal to compassion and empowerment.
If you have PCOS and have ever been told “it’s all in your head” or “just lose weight,” know this: you are not alone, and you are not at fault. You deserve answers about PCOS. You deserve options. You deserve better care.
It’s time we start listening. It’s time we start believing. It’s time women with PCOS get the respect and treatment they’ve always deserved.
